I have never been “just Aanya.” I have always been “the girl with allergies.” It’s funny how something invisible can define you so loudly, until you decide it won’t. Ever since I was a little kid, food allergies have been a marker of who I am. Sometimes it can feel like that is all people know me as: “the girl with allergies.” It can feel discouraging when that is all someone knows about you, but what feels worse is what comes with it.
Feelings of loneliness and isolation when you are the only one not eating cake at the party, or when they forget to accommodate your allergies. Feelings of jealousy and longing when you are around people who are eating the foods that you so want, but you can’t because it could literally kill you. And feelings of annoyance and irritation when people don’t understand what allergies are or their real impact. Most people don’t know the extent to which food allergies can affect your life, and they can literally cause life-threatening reactions. So, I’m not here to say some cringe, run-of-the-mill quotes. I am here to say that the only thing that can make you feel better about allergies, and help you avoid being affected by them, is you and the actions you take. I know exactly how it feels to be the odd one out at parties and how it feels to be sad or angry that you can’t eat anything. But as soon as you change your mindset, things start to look up.
I have applied this mindset as my school’s tennis team Captain. In tennis, the match can turn around at any moment. You could lose, one point away from game over, and still turn the whole match around and win. What enables you to do that is how you think about it. There have been many times when I told myself, “The match is already over; I am not as good as her”, but once you start to think that you can, you’re halfway there. I know, cringe advice, but this one is real. Likewise, once you frame allergies as an obstacle to cross rather than a barrier, life feels a lot easier. I find it important to focus on what you can do and eat rather than what you can't. I also find that speaking up for yourself and educating people about allergies increases your resilience and self-esteem because it shows you're in command of your own life. Once you start living by your own rules, not someone else’s preconceived views of who you are, you will find happiness and acceptance come much more easily and quickly.
Aanya Narula Sharma is a 12th grade student from Pennsylvania, health advocate has contributed youth perspectives to FARE, and leading allergy and asthma organizations, championing safer food practices for children worldwide.